The first rule of internet use? Don’t feed the trolls. The News Desk knows this, but, in this instance anyways, rules were meant to be broken. With a visit to Old Trafford looming at the weekend, Wayne Rooney has started up the verbal handbags already by tweeting that Luis Suarez should have been sent off for kicking Scott Parker during Liverpool’s scoreless draw with Spurs yesterday evening. While the media continues to make a crust painting the immediately apologetic Uruguayan as the pantomime villain of their ignorant fantasy land, the newly carpeted Manchester United striker has decided his rather esteemed opinion should also be heard. If Scott Parker had spoken up, then fair play to him. The boy was kicked quite hard when Suarez made a wholly non-malicious error in judgment, but to hear Wayne “Calmness Personified” Rooney call for a Red card is stupendously arrogant. The News Desk doesn’t have to remind you, our dear readers, of all of the on-field shenanigans the England striker has gotten up to, many of them passed off by himself and his various lapdogs as mistakes. Now, we’re confused. If Suarez made a mistake, and should have seen Red, shouldn’t all of the red cards handed out to the boy-wonder also be justified? Or does Wayne only kick people on purpose?
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