Depending on Who You Believe: Hey! We’re (not) Going to Ibiza!

While everyone is out on holiday enjoying the weather and the obscure alcoholic beverages that are all the rage, the News Desk is holed up in a cramped office, scouring the internet for something worth writing about. Since we’re not getting out of this stink-box anytime soon, we’re going to kick this off with Andy Carroll and the ludicrous link to Italian giants AC Milan that’s been making the rounds lately. After impressing at last months European Championship, the Geordie striker has apparently gained an admirer in Rossoneri big-wig Pier Silvio Berlusconi who said he’d love to see Carroll in red and black in the near future. While big Andy swigs beer and chats up birds in Ibiza, Berlusconi Jnr. is apparently trying to pry open Poppa’s checkbook to replace some of the senior citizens Milan cut loose this summer. There were quite a few Kopites counting out the cashbefore this bit of gossip got the old heave-ho when Pier told La Gazzetta dello Sport that Milan was done in the transfer market. Is this as far-fetched as it gets or should we be looking at another striker? Possibly a Columbian with a stellar rate of return?

Pour us another Pimm’s Cup and we’ll move this sweat-fest right along.

While it’s doubtful that Andy is Milan bound, it’s looking just as doubtful that Jackson Martinez will be on a plane to Portugal anytime soon as the Jaguares striker’s move to FC Porto running into construction on the transfer turnpike. The payment structure is most often cited source for the hold-up with the Columbian being left in the dark and, despite having a replacement already signed, told to report for pre-season training with the Mexican club. The 25 year old fox-in-the-box has been heavily linked with a move to Merseyside on a number of occasions as the goal drought continues at Liverpool. Though it’s unknown whether Martinez has even made it onto the radar of new Kop boss Brendan Rodgers, someone is going to have to put the ball in the net and we know it’s not going to be Gylfi Sigurdsson.

In a recent interview, Mr. Rodgers could hardly hide his contempt for the Icelandic midfielder who looked Anfield bound before the bright lights of the big city tempted him away. Now, we’re going to have to turn our attention other targets with Uruguayan playmaker Gaston Ramirez being the most tempting of the bunch. The Bologna midfielder, who is currently on duty with the Olympic team, is said to be available for somewhere in the region of £16 million, though the reported interest from both Manchester City and Juventus could jack the already stiff price up even higher. The early doors have our people talking to their people about their guy joining up with our guys, but with neither set of people willing to confirm that they’ve been talking about talking, we’re left wondering where Alberto Aquilani could fit into all this.

With interest from abroad cooling on the Italian, it looks like Aquilani will be part of Brendan Rodgers squad; at least for the time being. The infamous agent has been in the press again shooting his mouth off about decisions, considerations and discussions, but with nothing notable transpiring, we could toss around the idea of Alberto moving to Bologna as a make-weight in the Ramirez deal. If Italy is where the boy wants to be, and his agent keeps hounding us for some sort of proclamation on the midfielder’s future despite his insistence on playing both sides against the center, taking up permanent residence in Northern Italy could be an option that would suit both parties. Though all of this, including the reported interest in Ramirez, could be a ruse and Bolton midfielder Mark Davies could be the man Rodgers has been pining after. A 21 year old Uruguayan or 24 year old Englishman?

As long as it’s not Joe Cole, I think we’ll be happy either way.

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